Everybody does it and its a great conversation starter. When was the last time ———?

My wife and I talk about the lasts all the time. They work best on long car rides, or cold and rainy indoor days, or as just something to kill time and break-up boredom. But in my thinking lately, I have noticed things of far more importance that lie waiting in the ether of reminiscence.

When was the last time we went to a waterpark with the kids?

Waterparks were a big part of our parenting. The kids loved them, and it gave us some time to talk and/or read books on our Kindles ——now that’s ancient history! I remember driving to Duluth in mid-winter and parking in a hopelessly icy hotel parking lot, with temperatures hovering around 0F. We had the dog with us, and since we were staying at one of the early incarnations of dog friendly hotels we were stuck in a crappy room at ground level, same as the parking lot. The indoor waterparks windows were frozen with 2’ inches of ice and cold wafted through the place, but we toughed it out in the heated pool, with an occasional side-trip to the room to let the dog out. I really didn’t care for it very much, but the kids loved it paying no never mind to the conditions.

Another sketchy condition waterpark adventure took place on Christmas Night many years ago. We decided to leave at about 7pm on the 25th and drive 2 1/2 hours to a waterpark (3- Bears) in central Wisconsin. We underestimated the weather, near blizzard conditions for the drive. In the end we were rewarded with an empty hotel, a giant pool and waterpark to ourselves, and an indoor/outdoor hot tub—-Wow! Great service for breakfast the following morning, but the whole experience was a bit like the hotel in the movie “The Shining”. Anyway, the kids had a great time.

Still another time on vacation in Chicago. We stayed out near the Arlington Racetrack at a nice hotel, with a medium sized waterpark, and EZ double decker train service into downtown Chicago. The kids were thrilled! As they often did, they collected email addresses from friends and made great pledges of communication and fidelity to other children they met from exotic faraway places. It was all so sweet and innocent, but life is the stuff that happens when we arrived home. The jobs, the homework, school, endless activities, and friends closer to home. I often wonder if we flipped the polarity and lived most of our lives through transitory experiences, or just followed a whim —-how would things have turned out ? Would we all be a little more happy ? Sad? Better adjusted and more resilient ? Who knows….

Closer to home I remember one of our last waterpark experiences, in the “golden age (4-14)” at ValleyFair in Shakopee MN. We went with another family with similar age kids. The memory of it is a little painful because it was one of the last times we interacted with these friends. My son and their boy were fast friends, playing baseball together, hanging out, trading dinners at each others houses, and going to local events —same with my daughter. However, the rift started when we vacationed together in Disneyworld, maybe we shouldn’t have. They didn’t like it, we got up much to early in the morning, went to the wrong parks, ate at the wrong restaurants etc. —-it was just a little uncomfortable for both families. My daughter, the resilient one, lashed out at some bullying by their son and my son reacted by getting physically sick, because that is how he deals with conflict. When we arrived back in MN my wife confided in me that she had always felt that her wife counterpart never really liked her, this is how my wife deals with conflict. The social interactions faded quickly and by the time HS arrived there was very little connection left except between me and the other father via telephone. I always liked John, he had an easy laugh, and told great stories. The last straw with John came just this past summer. He had been calling me about a part time job selling timeshares. It was a little suspect that

John was so intent on giving me this special opportunity, when his family members were working jobs that were lower paying. I later found out that John was in management, and I know that there was something there that smelled a bit —-John’s stories always involved a bit of a con, lying, stealing, and grifting —-always for a good cause —-his family —-but! I reluctantly agreed to meet John at his place of work to discuss possibilities and sat in the waiting room for nearly 2 hours as he “closed a deal”. I was incensed and left, telling the receptionist that I had a prior commitment. John called 15 minutes later, apologized profusely, wanting to reschedule, and I begged off. He tried calling several more times and I didn’t pick- up, he got the message and that is the last I heard from him. There is a high probability that I will never communicate with him again, and I feel guilty. I have a lot of difficulty ending things, I feel just terrible, brings up a lot of stuff for me.

Much earlier, when the kids were maybe 7 and 5, we went to a waterpark in Sioux Falls SD. My wife had a work meeting out there and we stayed at a nice hotel with a waterpark. There was not much about the waterpark that was special, but there was a nice Italian restaurant attached to the hotel. The two days we spent there were rather forgettable, except for a couple of things. First, was the emergence of a medical issue for me, really the first time for me that something happened which down the road, would have some pretty serious consequences. I was in my late 40s at the time. Second, is the distinct recollection of looking at my wife sitting next to me by the pool and thinking how great she looked. She looked to me like the day we met, youthful, sparkling huge green eyes, energetic, hopeful for a great future, and in love with me. She was in her late 30s at the time, and sitting there looking at her, I thought that the feeling and youth could never end. That thought and feeling lasted for about 5 minutes —-and I still remember it to this day 17 yrs later. How does that happen?

My last Waterpark story is from Typhoon Lagoon in Disneyworld. Both my wife and I determined that the great waterpark adventures were done when my son was 14 and my daughter was 12, and we were wrong! One more opportunity presented itself in 2018 when my son graduated from HS. He did not want a traditional graduation —- open house, gifts, HS party—but instead opted for a Disney trip —-if he could take a couple of his best friends. Not to be left out my daughter insisted that she to bring a friend and we agreed. It is a trip that all of us still talk about to this day. The synergy was magical and Disney was truly the happiest place on earth for 5 days. Who would have thunk it ? ——sometimes the timing, the interaction, the personalities, the weather, and the magic work together to create a lifetime experience. It was 5 days of frantic activity, laughter, jokes, and high energy fun! My wife and I watched from the sidelines and enjoyed it as much as the kids did. This was a last of lasts—never to be outdone! We have eschewed going back and repeating, thinking that somehow the memory of that experience could be damaged…..

Until now … we are going back for a 3 day trip in late November with my son, daughter, and her boyfriend. I am nervous that it will not live up to expectations —-and my wife is down on the whole idea—I think she fears the worst, and is much more capable of giving up on things than me. We will find out!

I could go on about other waterpark experiences we have had in the Black Hills SD, The Wisconsin Dells WI, Arrowhead in Alexandria MN, and more. Multiple places, multiple times! All of them share both common and unique experiences which I tend to perseverate on as I get older.

The game of the “lasts” is fraught with incredible joy and terrible sorrow, like life itself. I encourage you to play, but be careful, it might dredge up some muck not so easily forgotten. So play at your own risk!